Jinan Zeidan's Blog

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The Outsiders

They are humans just like us, enjoying their life, and having their own families. But, they always feel as if they don’t belong to the world they are living in; they feel like they are strangers from their family and friends. They are the outsiders.

 Agony is their best friend; no matter how hard they try to let themselves get out of that circle of misery, they can’t. They are unable to resist the feeling that the whole world is against them, even with their friends, they keep on feeling that they don’t belong to that friendship. They live as strangers in this life, living to figure out what they lack, but they never find the reason behind this feeling. They never find the answers for their questions.

Sensitivity is their first problem, and aggression is one of their biggest issues. However, it is not towards people, sometimes just towards themselves. They treat themselves as if their existence is their fault; the world looks at them as normal people but they victimize themselves. What lies behind their odd sentiments is what they have been through in life.

Violence is one of the main reasons that cause them to have a low self esteem. Especially when they experience it with their families; this is a real tragedy, for a family should save them from violent behavior that they face outdoors. The definition of a home should be a place that reinforces confidence, comfort, tenderness, safety, respect, happiness and so on. So when the fear grows with them inside their home, when they leave their place every morning to face the street life with no self-esteem, they are not able to face the world bravely. Their families are supposed to welcome them with arms wide open to decrease their pain, but instead, that same family turns their back on them. Therefore, the feeling that they don’t belong to the world they live in starts to grow up inside of them. If his/her own family has never accepted them, then they begin to think, “How can strangers or the whole world accept me?” And so, they started their journey outdoor as outsiders.

Their weak personality prevents them from accepting others, and no matter how simple things go, they view it in a negative way. They always doubt their abilities and people who surround them. They are used to expecting to be the ones held responsible; even if someone is complimenting them, they feel as they are being bullied. And if someone defends them for some reason, they feel as if they are being pitied. In their opinion, they are bothering every person they meet on this earth, though they are not. The outsiders have a fragile heart; they feel that the whole world is working against them. Their negative thoughts and what they have been through their life, make things worse on them when they go out to experience life. They meet people who will make fun of them, will have managers who will be little them, will face challenges, and will fail to avoid the traps that some competitors set up to make them fall. How are they supposed to move on with their life as outsiders?

 They didn’t choose to have this feeling; no one likes to be a stranger in life, live emotionally away from his/her own family, or have a kind of distance with their close friends. But life sometimes is unfair to some people, especially when their families help the world be against them. They become paranoid, with a hunch that everyone is following them; they feel that they are wrong even though they are right. They are humans just like us; they are living between us but far away, they are living inside this world but as outsiders .

 Jinan

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July 28, 2010 - Posted by | childhood, emotions, English, fear, forgiveness, friendship, Hate, Letters, Life, Love, Memories, others, outsiders, Past, Peace, silence, Smile, Speak, Thought, Trust, unfaithful, Violence, Words

7 Comments »

  1. Love your particular style of writing.
    The nature of your reality is abundandtly rich with meaning.
    Thank you Jinan for sharing that..

    Outsiders severed their connections with other levels of reality, to be separated for a while from their greater identity, and to appear not to know the details of the larger plan on a conscious level, yet in their hearts they know the purposeful probable realities from a place where time is not.

    Comment by sidOly | July 29, 2010 | Reply

  2. Hi Jinan, I just happen to be one of those outsiders, and let me tell you it sucks big time. The only reason I am still alive today is because 22 years ago I met this amazing man that did what no other person on earth has ever done for me, not even my parents. He showed me what unconditional love actually is, and together we showed our children that same unconditional love. I may never feel like I belong in this world, but no matter what life dishes out I know beyond a shadow of a doubt I will always belong in the arms of my husband. Thank you for sharing this and helping me understand myself a little bit more.

    Comment by Angela Jeffery | July 28, 2010 | Reply

    • Hi Angela…
      Thank you for your comment and for your courage to tell me your story. I’m sorry to know that you have been one of those outsiders, at the same time I’m glad that God sent you someone to save you. God bless you and Bless your family too.
      You are welcome 🙂

      Comment by Jinan Zeidan | August 18, 2010 | Reply

  3. Thank you for sharing. I believe that one of our task in this world is to help people who feel that way to realize that they are not alone, a kind word of appreciation, a smile just to let them know someone cares and they matter. To teach, share and help them to grow. Love & Blessings!

    Comment by Maria Serna | July 28, 2010 | Reply

  4. Beautiful story sister so very true how many feel this way that is why we are here Now to share with all as we are One . Love you sister Brenda

    Comment by Brenda McAleer | July 28, 2010 | Reply

    • Love you too Brenda 🙂 thank you so much for your lovely comments as usuall 🙂

      Comment by Jinan Zeidan | August 18, 2010 | Reply

  5. Thank you Jinan, a very thought provoking piece. There are probably more people out there who feel like this then we know, thats why we have to give our love and hearts to everyone to let them know they are accepted and a part of this life/world. What does it cost to smile, to say hello or a few nice words, to show kindness etc, the more we practice this the more they come to accept themselves and know they are accepted by everyone. Theres a saying – You cant choose your family but you can choose your friends. I will pray with you for these souls and ask God to help them accept themselves as He does. Blessings and love Jinan always xxxxxx

    Comment by Gabby | July 28, 2010 | Reply


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